Sunday, February 6, 2011

Almost there....

It's almost Monday in Seoul.  We're about 8 hours away from, you guessed it, processing time, when all those workers go back to work after their holiday and start pushing our paperwork, appointments, etc on through!  There's been a lot of Travel Calls for lots of Adopted Parents ahead of my family lately.  So hoping we hear something this week.  We're getting really close now.  And, I am so glad!  I've felt more stress, more tension, more everything this last week.  It's finally getting down to the wire, and I'm feeling every bit of it perched right on my shoulders and my chest! I can't concentrate on much of anything, glad my work doesn't take a whole lot of mental strain to complete. Just a lot of physical, which I could really use!  I feel myself slipping away from reality almost.  Lately, some days, all I want to do is run away, don't know for how long, just to get away from the stress of ALL OF IT! Yes, pretty much all of it.  So yeah,  I'm having a hard time this week. I seem to be withdrawing from reality. Which tells me, I'm stressed, not sure how to deal with all these "things" that are on my mind.  When "things" get tough, I tend to shut down, and I kind of see it happening now. At least now I can recognize it, when years ago, I didn't.  I feel like all I want to do is sleep, to catch a break. I don't want to get up in the mornings, and I can't wait to go to bed.   I don't want to worry some who read this, just trying my best to make it through each hour, each day, somewhat seemingly sane.  I feel like I'm about to crack up.  But, I've been through hard times like this before, and made it through.  I know I'll be okay. Just stinks when you're right in the middle of it. So I will keep on doing what it is I do, every day till we can all be back home and start our new life together.  Which can not get here soon enough.  So don't mind this "vent" today.  I'll keep chugging along, like I always do, just feeling the weight of it all lately.....