I had a day off yesterday which was Friday - Yah! Got a lot done around the house and outside. We even got the final paperwork on our home computer for the lightening strike that took out all our electronics upstairs over a month ago - grrrrr. Now we've got to fill out another paper and send it into our insurance company and pray they give us enough to cover at least some of it what we lost.
Our dentist office called and wanted to verify that Mike had an appointment on Monday. I said I'd check with him and if there was a problem I'd call back. I emailed him at work and asked if he could make it then, told him a little of what I was doing around the house and waited for him to email back. I was in and out of the house, cleaning, picking up, etc. So he emailed me back and said yes to the dentist appointment, and some other things. I emailed back and asked if he wanted to ride the bikes this weekend and blow the cobwebs off of them. He emailed back and asked if Taylor would be going and if not what could she do instead, that the weather was going to really nice and it would be nice if we all went since I'm 'consumed with this adoption 90% of the time'. Hmmmm.... Didn't think too much about the comment right then, but it stuck in my head.
Today is Saturday, we all got up, none too early - it's Saturday - YAH! Took showers, had breakfast, did a few things and decided to go ride the bikes. So, Mike, Taylor, and I went down to Hendersonville's Indian Lake area and decided to eat at Red Robin. While we were waiting for our food, I asked Mike what he meant by that statement - "consumed 90% of my time", keep in mind I'm not angry or upset, just wanted to know his thinking at that time. He mentioned that I spend a lot of time on the computer in the evenings, notebook beside me, always thinking/preparing for the next 'step', and how much time I spend "thinking about the adoption of our little boy". In all fairness, he's right. I do spend a lot of time on the computer in the evenings (researching), uhhh the afternoons too, and yes a little in the mornings, in between checking on Taylor to see if she's getting ready for school. Am I consumed??? I asked him did he really think I was consumed 90% of the time? He said, it may just seem that way. Of course the only time we're all together is in the evenings after work, school, and before bedtime........when I'm on the computer. And yes it's true, I am totally consumed!
I think about this process close to 90% of the day, kind of a shocker to me! It's true though. But how could I not? It's all I have at this point, all my thoughts are surrounded by this process, what's next, what needs to be done, what we'll need in the close future. You start out this process with the "it'll happen one day". Then you move a little further with the "one of these days". Then you get to the "one day soon" to "is it ever going to happen?!" This process is not for the weak, not for the strong, not for the impatient, not for the sain. This is what we Adopted Parents go through to welcome a child into our homes. But it's so worth it in the end!
